The other night I was looking over my notes from a women's conference I attended a month or so ago. (Here's a side note plug for Fresh Grounded Faith conference. Please go if there is ever one near you, it's worth your time and money. God has truly gifted Jennifer Rothschild in presenting His Word and encouraging women!)
While looking over my notes, I saw where one of the speakers was talking about God delivering the Israelites out of Egypt. This lead me to Exodus, which then lead me to decide I would like to read Exodus. All of this to set up how I ended up in Exodus chapter 2. I'll be honest, I tend to hang out in the New Testament and don't frequent the Old Testament. As I'm reading Exodus, I'm reminded of the sweetness in the display of God pursuing His people throughout the entire Bible!
Ok, so getting more to the point of why I'm writing this blog in the first place and why I titled this blog "Cry Out to Him who Knows." I bet you Bible scholars and Bible trivia champs were thinking I would be focusing on Moses here since Exodus 2 primarily speaks about the background story of Moses, but no. God spoke to the depths of my heart and soul in those last 3 verses of chapter 2.
"During those many days the king of Egypt died, and the people of Israel groaned because of their slavery and cried out for help. Their cry for rescue from slavery came up to God. And God heard their groaning, and God remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob. God saw the people of Israel - and God knew."
I found the cries of my heart resonating with the Israelites in Exodus 2:23-25. No I'm not in slavery and I'm not being oppressed by anyone in particular. However, I have found myself in a place this past year of being in circumstances that I would not choose for myself. I've actually typed and retyped this paragraph a few times now and decided to not beat around the bush. Steve & I have been trying to have a baby for a little over a year and a half now. It's interesting how when I look back to when we started this journey how many misconceptions I've realized I had. One being, it'll be easy and we can make it happen in our timing. Don't worry, God has very much so reminded me that He is the giver of life and things happen in His perfect timing. Another misconception I began to have is that when things didn't go as planned I began thinking no one understands how I'm feeling. Again, God has been gracious to place people in my life who do understand and to encourage me.
Let me stop and say, this is not me complaining or having a pity blog party. My desire, the desire I believe God is giving me, is to hopefully encourage others who may be in this same situation by sharing how God has given me encouragement through His Word this week. You may not be in this same situation, but there is no doubt we all find ourselves in the midst of struggles and circumstances that we would not choose for ourselves.
This journey to conceive has been humbling, frustrating, encouraging, and hard all rolled up in a big ball of the messiness of real life. There is so much I could say about this struggle - how it affects my relationships with my friends with kids or who are pregnant, the struggle to be content, dealing with the dreaded questions of "do you have kids?" or "when are you going to have kids?", trying to smile politely and give answers to questions that will not leave people uncomfortable or thinking you are the most bitter person on the planet, and so on. But instead of focusing on these things, I am now turning back to Exodus and the sweetness of the Truth of God found in the end of chapter 2.
The Israelites groaned because of their slavery and cried out to God. I find myself groaning in our struggle to conceive. I feel the despair and temptation to throw up my hands in defeat because the feelings and emotions are so overwhelming at times, but how often am I crying out to God? How often do I truly get on my knees before the Lord and cry out to Him in my despair? How often do I come before Him with the honesty of David found in the Psalms? Now I do, but if I'm honest, I so often try to deal with it in my own strength and by my own feeble will. God continues to show me how I need to cry out to Him and trust that I can do all things THROUGH Christ who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13), not through Amanda who just gives out of strength.
So I see that I need to follow this example of the Israelites and not just sit in my groaning, but cry out to the Lord. Then comes the really sweet part of these verses that brought me so much peace and comfort. Verse 24 says, "And God heard…" God heard their groaning and just as He heard the Israelites, God hears me and God hears you.
It goes on to say that "God remembered His covenant…" God remembers His promises to His people. God has promised us many things in His Word. He has promised that He works all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28) He promises that if we trust in Him and lean not on our own understanding but in all our ways acknowledge Him that He will make our paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6) I could go on and on listing promises God has given to us throughout His Word. God does not forget these. They are true and He remembers them!
And finally in verse 25, "God saw the people of Israel" and "God knew." God doesn't just see us, He knows us. How incredible is it that the God of the universe who spoke everything into being "knows" us?! How well does He know us? Please quit reading this blog and go read Psalm 139 to see how well God knows us. I can't begin to come close to expressing how God knows us better than this Psalm. I will save you the time of even reading me make an attempt at it.
So as God has encouraged me through His Word, I encourage you in the midst of your struggles and groaning to cry out to God and know that He will hear you. He will remember His promises to His people. He will see you and he knows you. As a child of God you are not crying out to a distant God, you are known.
"O Lord, You have searched me and known me!" (Psalm 139:1)
